Selfishness / Kindness
These two are opposites, so might as well combine them.
Biggest lesson on helping people
Help people with no expectations of return.
I want to help people more. Why? To become a better person. To become the person I admire.
You don’t have to be friends with everyone. But you must be friendly with everyone.
Resources:
Empathy
You don’t always know what people are going through. Even when you know, you might not always understand. People I know personally will probably read this. I can guarantee some of them will have no idea I went through any of this. Be mindful of how you speak and the potential effect it can have on others. There are toxic environments and mentalities everywhere. Don’t fuel these. They do more harm than good. Be kind to others. Don’t go out of your way to be an asshole.
Other Stuff
Judge a person by how they treat everyone, not just you.
Someone who is nice to you, but unkind to others is not a good person.
Dilemma that I was going through in SHAD 2019
I was going through this problem: I help people to help myself. So intrinsically, I am still selfish.
- 2022-12-15: I think it’s great to help others to help yourself. And it’s not even like that’s a bad thing. What are you going to do, stop helping others? because if you help others, that would be selfish? That is stupid. People would rather be helped than not helped?? like that is so obvious
Conclusion: Stop overthinking, you just need more love in your life, you are doing great. Of course, keep striving to help people.
It’s okay to help people to help yourself, as long as there is not expectation of return. As long as you don’t help someone with the intention of achieving/expecting a certain goal (i.e. they giving you a referral, them inviting you to parties, etc.).
Also there’s this note from V that has now been moved into private.